What kind of relationship do have with your mother?
I wish that I had some fond memories of my mother, but in truth she always treated me more like a servant, or an apprentice, than a daughter. Her past remains a mystery to me—she would never speak of it. I always got the feeling that our presence reminded her of something from long ago that she wanted to forget. And not being able to forget made her more angry and bitter by the year. Growing up, I was determined to not be like her, which only made the tension between us worse. Honestly, being away from her poisonous influence has lifted a huge weight from my soul that I was weary of carrying.
How has your relationship with your sister Elowyn changed?
Elowyn surprised me—I am not sure when she grew from a little child I needed to watch after, to the capable, independent girl she has become. Through everything that has happened to us, I’ve learned not to underestimate her. I suspect that being away from our mother will allow her to finally come into her own and find her place in the world. It will be difficult for me though; I am now responsible for her, yet I cannot control her as though I was her mother. I can only hope to earn her respect well enough that she will allow me to guide her with whatever wisdom Aviad grants me.
Do you have any regrets about leaving Tyroc?
I do not regret my decision—not yet. Our future would have been a bleak and joyless one had we stayed. But I do feel some guilt about the manner in which we left. I do not know how our mother will fare without us, we gave her no warning at all. Much as she would loathe to admit it, she relied on my skills, and Elowyn’s, for her survival.
Now that you have a chance to start over, what is your greatest hope for the future?
Right now it is hard to hope beyond our immediate need to get to Minhaven safely. I pray daily that we all arrive there whole and well, and that we can make a new and better life for ourselves. Sometimes I lie awake at night, burdened by this huge responsibility I have taken for my sisters’ lives. But I have found comfort in prayer that we are on the path Aviad has chosen for us.
Your tutor, Gareth, had a huge impact on your life before he was forced to leave Tyroc. You wanted to go with him at the time, but could not. Do you ever think you will ever try to find him?
My heart wishes for it to be so, but my mind tells me that it would be a fool’s chase. I do not even know where he went, or if he stayed once he got there. If we ever cross paths again in this life, it will be Aviad’s doing.